Back to School: Managing the Transition and Minimizing Meltdowns
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- Written by Julie Stonberg
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There's a chill in the air first thing in the morning and you've worn your white jeans for the last time. As parents, we often breathe a sigh of relief when school finally starts, but for kids the transition can be a little trickier. While most children begin the year with a healthy mixture of nerves and excitement, those first few weeks of early wake-ups, new teachers, and the return of homework and schedules can be tough on everyone. So whether you spent the week before school getting organized and easing back into regular routines, or just in complete denial that the lazy days of summer were actually coming to an end, here are some tips to help kids ease into fall.
Start by talking to your kids about the year. Find out what they are thinking -- what they are looking forward to, what they may be worried about. Ask them to think about any goals they have. Having this discussion as a family or one-on-one with each child is a way to connect and also to acknowledge that things are about to change. It can also alert you to any specific concerns they may have. Yesterday, for example, I asked my 8th grader what he wanted out of this year and he said he wants to do really well in school because he knows this year counts for his transcript for college! I'm not sure where he heard that but I was able to tell him that that actually wasn't true, and I saw him visibly relax.
Get in the habit with your child of organizing as much as possible the night before – from clothes picked out to backpacks packed and lunches made. The fewer tasks left for the morning, the less hectic and frazzled everyone will feel. With a calmer start to the day your child (and you) will feel centered and ready to meet the world.
Encourage kids to spend time outside after school. Winter is long, and there will be plenty of time for the x-box, but you can take advantage of the weather these first few weeks leading into fall to let them expend energy and get some natural light and fresh air between school and homework. Being outside changes moods for the better, and will help make the transition to sitting inside for hours in a classroom seem less like a complete system shock.
Have spaces set up for homework that are organized and clutter-free. Plan with your child where he/she would like to do their work. Older kids tend to like the privacy of their rooms, while younger ones often prefer the kitchen table, or other areas of the house where they feel less isolated. There is no right or wrong place to do their work, as long as it's getting done, and it will give them a sense of control if they are allowed some say in where they set up.
As much as possible keep bedtime on the earlier side these first few weeks. Even an hour more of sleep per night can help a child cope with stress and regulate his emotions better. As the evening winds down, go over the following day with your child, including any appointments and after school activities, who is picking him up and driving him home, and where he should look for the rides. You may know you signed your son up for soccer on Tuesdays, but it's news to him! If possible, keeping extra-curriculars light that first week or two also helps ease the transition to a longer more structured day.
Consciously make time to connect as a family. Eat dinner together as much as you can, and make a weekend day or night plan that includes everyone. Chances are the summer offered many opportunities to be together so it's helpful to keep that thread going as the year starts and it can feel like everyone is off their own direction.
Accept that when all is said and done, there will be a period of adjustment, complete with anxious and cranky children, an extra tantrum (or four) and some frazzled nerves on your end. Many kids hold it together at school, only to seemingly fall apart at home until they get used to the routine. Give them the space to let it out, and let them know that you understand that it takes time to adjust to new teachers and schedules and that it's SO normal to feel overwhelmed.
Sometimes it helps to stand back and think big picture about your child and how she reacts to stressful situations in general. For example, when my daughter was about to start 9th grade, she had such a complete and violent meltdown when I asked her if her school supplies were organized, that I wondered how she would make it through the year. But when I thought about it, I realized that not only had she had an almost identical meltdown when I tried to explain to her how to use a combination lock the day before she started middle school, but I also remembered handing her to the elementary school secretary crying for the first two weeks of first grade, and her practically hyperventilating when I left her in the "two's" for the first time. It helped me to see that in the past she had been able to pull herself together just fine, and this pre high-school meltdown was just another stop along the road.
Finally, remember to reassure yourself that this too shall pass, and that kids usually do settle in within a few weeks, and those long lazy days will seem a distant memory...for now.
Julie Stonberg is a clinical social worker at Westchester Family Counseling in Hartsdale, www.westchesterfamilycounseling.com.
Another Successful Season for the Scardale Recreation Department Day Camps
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- Written by Joanne Wallenstein
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Now that the season has wrapped up, we asked the new Supervisor for Scarsdale Parks, Recreation and Conservation Brian Gray a few questions about how the summer camp program went this year.
How many children did the program serve this summer – and what is their age range?
Overall the camp season was a great success with a total of 857 campers enrolled in the program on our busiest weeks. Children range from entering K in the fall to entering 8th in the fall.
How many people did the program employ?
180 for Day Camps, 11 for Sports Camp, 5 for Teen Travel
What is the largest/most popular camp? And why?
Tough to tell why certain camps have higher enrollment then others, however, here is the breakdown of campers per camp:
Sagamore (K) 141
Lenape (1st grade) 145
Wapetuck (2nd grade) 166
Patthunke (3rd – 8th grade) 220
Sports Camp (1st – 8th) 69
Soccer Camp (1st – 8th) 36
Travel Camp (6th – 8th) 2 sessions of 40
What special programs did you offer this summer?
Our elective program at Camp Patthunke was a big hit this summer offering activities such as horseback riding, fashion design and robotics.
How did the teen travel camp go? Any interesting trips to note?
We filled 2 sessions of 40 children each session. Most popular trips are always the amusement parks such as Great Adventure, Lake Compounce and Mountain Creek however we also send the campers to activities such as: deep sea fishing, indoor rock climbing, whitewater rafting and major league baseball games.
What were some of the highlights of this summer?
A very successful Family Carnival held at the Scarsdale Middle School
What were some of the biggest successes? .... Anything you will repeat next summer – or not?
Overall I fell the camp is a success for all age groups. We will continue with our traditional offerings such as performing arts, arts and crafts, sports, and our swimming program. In the off season, camp staff will brainstorm additional offerings for our elective program at Camp Patthunke as well as new ideas for trips.
When does the recreation department begin work on next year's program? Is it a year-round effort?
Unfortunately there is not much down time for a camp of our size and program offerings. Over the next few months we will be wrapping up this season and as early as December we begin reaching out to our returning staff and begin to book trips, order supplies, etc.
Lunch and a Show: The Spectacular Rockettes and Rock Center Café
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- Written by Stacie M. Waldman
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Living just outside of Manhattan, I know that I sometimes take things for granted --like the ability to win the Hamilton lottery and actually get to the city in time for the show. Of course, I have not been so lucky to have won, so I'm filling the void with other spectacular shows in the city such as...
The New York Spectacular Starring the Radio City Rockettes! The Christmas Spectacular has become so popular that the Rockettes now perform a super pumped up spring/summer show at Radio City Music Hall. Written by Douglas Carter Beane and directed and choreographed by Mia Michaels (of So You Think You Can Dance fame), the show will put a huge smile on your face and make you want to jump out of your seat and dance. The costumes by Emilio Sosa were magnificent. I wish I had counted the number of the Rockette's costume changes.
The show opened featuring the Rockettes rocking out to Taylor Swift's "Welcome to New York." It sets the stage, so to speak, for the entire show; big, loud special effects galore, cutting edge technology, masterful puppetry and a completely New York experience that will resonate with you long after leaving the theater. Anyone who lives in and around New York will be able to relate to and understand all of the song and dance numbers and appreciate the visual effects that are woven into the set. And anyone who comes to see the show as a tourist will feel like they just experienced the entire city with Jacob (Vincent Crocilla) and Emily (Jenna Ortega), the children we follow throughout the show. They come from Connecticut with their parents to visit popular sites in the city where their parents met and wooed one another years ago but get separated from each other when the subway doors shut. (This is something that literally almost happened to me when my son was four -- but one look at his face told me he had no recollection of that- thank goodness.) Impressively, it actually looks like a subway comes across the Radio City Stage.
It's a good thing their parents hit every major New York City site during the early days of their relationship because the audience joins Jacob and Emily from Grand Central Terminal to the Metropolitan Museum of Art where the paintings come alive (super cool) and then down to Wall Street. The Wall Street number alone is enough to warrant going to see the show. The kids then try to find their parents at the New York Public Library where the lion statues at the entrance do a hilarious rap using Hamilton-style prose. I could not figure out how they got the lions to look like statues but move with such fluidity. Mom and Dad were not at the library but they could have gone to Central Park so the kids go there and have some fun with the Alice in Wonderland statue.
Next up was my kids' favorite number- Singin' in the Rain. Not only are most kids familiar with the song, but the Rockettes bring it to life by tap dancing with umbrellas and raincoats while water shoots onto the stage. Alas, they head to Times Square to the delight of the Radio City audience and then down Fashion Avenue in another huge number featuring the Rockettes performing to "Vogue" by Madonna. Each leggy lady struts her stuff down the runway in a unique outfit. It's fun to watch and the energy during this number is tremendous. The kids head to the Empire State building and then the Statue of Liberty before reuniting with their worried parents and the show concludes a mind-bogglingly finale. We all left feeling as if we had actually seen every landmark site in Manhattan- it was all so realistic. Overall, the show was modern with its choreography, soundtrack, and use of technology but the Rockettes were still classics. It's a show that caters to all audiences, young, old and in between. Running 90-minutes with no intermission, the show is appropriate for most children ages 4 and up.
What's a matinee in the city without some
lunch beforehand? We checked out Rock Center Café smack in the middle of Rockefeller Center. We lucked out with a perfect day to eat outside right at this national historical landmark. The servers couldn't have more attentive to my family of four and children are welcome at this establishment (there's a nice children's menu). Many reviewers online raved about its location during the colder months as well because along with the view of the Rockefeller Center fountains and the sculpture of Prometheus, you dine with a view of the famous ice rink and the Christmas tree.
The food was better than the typical tourist-area restaurant. We started with corn flour-encrusted calamari and the signature guacamole. The calamari was crispy and flavorful and the guacamole was fresh and perfectly seasoned. We split a hard frozen lemonade (utterly delightful) and I had the shrimp chop-chop salad, served with tasty buttermilk herb dressing and chopped capers to round out the flavor. The kids' meals were quite palate pleasing. One kid had "the best grilled cheese on the planet" and the other had "you can't actually not make pasta good" pasta. I rarely order dessert at restaurants but it was irresistible for good reason. We had a decadent trio of the strawberry shortcake, NY cheesecake, and tartufo banana split. Our stomachs were smaller than our eyes but I am happy we got to taste it. I appreciate attention to quality in restaurants and the manager, Alan, made his way from table to table throughout our meal, lighting up the place with his smile and ensuring that all diners were happy with their meal and their service. It makes a difference.
Best of all, Rock Center Café and Radio City have partnered to offer lunch at the café with tickets to the Rockettes.
Don't miss out! The show is running now through August 7th every day of the week except Tuesday at the historic Radio City Music Hall. Catch a sneak peek and order tickets here.
Youth Tennis League and Tournament - Final Week!
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- Written by Joanne Wallenstein
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Sign Up Now for the Youth Tennis Tournament
The final week of the 32nd season of the Scarsdale Summer Youth Tennis League will run from Monday , August 1st through Thursday, August 4th from 6 PM to 8 PM at the Middle School Tennis Courts with registration and practice for the Annual Youth Tennis Tournaments in different skill levels : beginner, novice, intermediate and advanced to be held on Thursday, August 4th at 6 PM .
The registration fee is $ 50 for each player, boys and girls ages 6 to 18, with all players receiving a participation trophy and a NYJTL Tee Shirt. The tournaments conclude with a pizza and ice cream party and championship trophies .
Interested youth and parents should contact Bob Harrison, the 32 year volunteer director of the program, at 914 646-4054 or proscars@aol.com and show up at the Middle School Tennis Courts to play.
Geocaching: The Forever Adventure
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- Written by Stacie M. Waldman
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With the warm weather comes the spirit of outdoor adventure for some of us. Maybe the kids are away at sleepaway camp and you're looking for some fun activities for you and your partner; maybe the kids are up for an adventure themselves; maybe you're up for a solo challenge or looking for something to do with a friend; maybe you're looking to get your high schooler inspired (and out of bed before noon). Whatever your motivation, geocaching may be the perfect activity for those looking for a mental and/or physical challenge, or even just a fun way to kill a bit of time almost anywhere.
Geocaching is touted as "...an any day, any time adventure that can take you to amazing and beautiful places in the place you live or the places you want to visit," by www.geocaching.com. Essentially, with the help of one of any number of apps on your smartphone, it's a never ending outdoor scavenger hunt with strangers.
A geocache is an item, typically a container, that holds a number of items and has been hidden at a location whose coordinates are posted on the internet. Geocaching is the pastime of looking for a geocache and a geocacher is someone who...well, you get the idea. Usually there is a log book in the container so fellow geocachers can log their names once they find the treasure. Also geocachers are encouraged to log their find online and write about their experience. Some geocaches encourage an exchange of "knick knacks." One friend of mine took a marble and left an eraser. There are two million caches worldwide and this number is ever-increasing. In fact, there's more than one near you right now.
eocaches come in different shapes, sizes, and difficulties in terms of the terrain needed to traverse to get to the geocache as well as difficulty in terms of how hard the geocache is to find. For example, overall difficulty is rated on a scale of 1-5. Caches can be traditional in nature or they can be puzzle caches or mystery caches for the more advanced and adventurous. Cache size can be micro, small, regular, or large (and you can find size definitions on your app). They can be in the subway, underwater, at the end of a long hike, or any number of places. A geocache may be a large plastic container, a 35mm film container, a fake rock with a secret compartment. Part of the mystery and adventure is that most geocaches are completely different. I've only been geocaching once but it was in a forest in a suburb outside of Boston. We followed unmarked trails (versus the marked ones) for about 45 minutes. Using the app and some clues, (namely tiny one-inch-tall birdhouses that were nailed to trees along the way,) we found the geocache. The whole forest was transformed in this area. There was a fairy village set up (and there happened to be a live snake living in one fairy house) as well as train tracks that wrapped around the trees. My kids were amazed, possibly turning all future hikes into a disappointment.
There are guidelines that geocachers are asked to follow.
If you take something from a geocache, you should leave something of equal or greater value. You should log your experience. Illegal items should not be placed in geocaches. Geocaches are never buried. Geocache sites recommend that geocachers check a log to see that someone has recently logged a find, indicating that the cache is in place and can be found. You can also hide a geocache yourself as long as you follow the appropriate guidelines.
The White Family tested out geocaching, unsure if their 14-year-old daughter and 10-year-old son would be into it. The verdict? "It's a really great way to combine techie interests with the outdoor and hiking," Sarah White said. "I think that for kids who are less active, it provides a good incentive to move and explore. The swag involved, like the trinkets in the box, were not the incentive as much as the treasure hunting aspect of geocaching."
You can walk out your front door right now and find a geocache nearby. Here are some local geocaches to get you started. Opening an account is free.
Please comment if you've been geocaching and share your experiences.
