The Holidays- Fun or Frustrating?
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- Written by Joanne Wallenstein
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This was submitted by Dr. Ilana Rosenberg of Scarsdale Psychology Associates
Many people love getting together with family for the holidays. Many people want to leave the table screaming. It can be tough to connect with family members who may have different political views, have caused you hurt or trauma, or that you just don't like.
Here's a tip to help you get through with sanity and grace:
Most Generous Interpretation
Dr. Becky talks about finding the most generous interpretations of children's behaviors. I think she's right. It's important to understand that both children and adults are trying to do the best they can with the resources they have available to them.
People survey their environment and respond to internal and external triggers to create safety for themselves. Even adults are dealing with younger parts of themselves that may come out when getting together with family.
Say your obnoxious cousin or aunt is at Thanksgiving and loudly voices a political opinion that you find abhorrent.
Or say you spent the week prepping for the meal, shopping and cooking and your mom mentions that the turkey is dry, or has a negative look on her face.
If you take it personally, you’ll feel badly and it could ruin your day.
Instead of thinking: what’s wrong with that person? Try asking: what happened to that person?
If you can see beyond the person’s mask, you can see their obnoxious comment as a defense they’re using to protect themselves and you can understand how this defense gets in the way of their being at ease in the world. Replacing judgment with compassion, can help you see the goodness at their core.
Applying the most generous interpretation of another person’s behavior won’t just help the other person feel better. It will make your holiday more enjoyable!
Ilana D. Rosenberg, Ph.D. is the founder of Scarsdale Psychology Associates (SPA). She believes that developing self compassion is a game changer in life, and that the chemistry of the match between you and your therapist is what helps make therapy so powerful. SPA has therapists who are warm and compassionate, so that you feel cared for every step of the way.
www.ScarsdalePsychologyAssociates.com 914-901 3520
A Parisian Bistro in Harrison
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- Written by Joanne Wallenstein
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This weekend we happened into another newish area restaurant, masquerading as a neighborhood bar but delivering haute cuisine. Café Deux, on Main Street in Harrison appears to be a local hangout but the fare is as good as you’ll find in Manhattan.
Open for three meals a day, we tried dinner on Saturday night and were pleased to find an eclectic menu, skewing French but with Indian, Italian and American influences.
Overhanging the bar is a long string of lights, casting a warm glow and giving the restaurant a modern flair. On the way in we noticed a case filled small dark chocolate cupcakes that we didn’t have room to sample on the way out. Next time.
The drinks menu was extensive – with a wide variety of wines, spirits, mixed drinks and mocktails. Something for drinkers and non-drinkers alike.
The menu includes starters to share, salades, moules, pastas, “Les Autres” and sides and offered a tempting array for meat eaters, fish lovers and vegetarians.
To start, we split an ample portion of the Fall Harvest Salad with romaine, radicchio, endive, oranges, figs, beets, radish and ricotta salata. We were tempted to try the whipped ricotta and fig toast and the duck confit Lyonnaise.
Mussels, either in a classic white wine sauce or with curry are served with fries or baguette.
Very popular are the burgers. There’s a Deux Wagyu Burger with house aioli, cheddar and fries – but you can also upgrade to truffle fries with parmesan and white truffle oil. Those are rich enough to share with everyone at the table.
I went for the Poulet Roti Masala, which was a sliced chicken breast covered with roasted chickpeas, haricots verts, prunes, mint, basil and cilantro. It was aromatic and yummy. I would love to have the recipe. The tuna nicoise salade had spiced, blackened tuna with a soft boiled egg, potatoes and nicoise olives. Another nice option.
For dessert we were happy to find a few flavors of Caffe Panna Ice Cream and had to share a few for the table.
Café Deux was a pleasant surprise within a quick drive to Scarsdale, but with an air of Paris.
Try them soon and let us know what you think in the comments section below.
Cafe Deux
307 Halstead Avenue, Harrison
https://www.cafedeuxny.com/
Scarsdale Foundation Bowl Committee Seeks Nominations for 2025 Honorees
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- Written by Joanne Wallenstein
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The 2025 Scarsdale Bowl Committee is looking for nominations for both the 2025 Bowl Award recipient and 2025 Spotlight Award recipient. The Scarsdale Bowl Committee seeks as many deserving candidates for consideration as possible.
The Scarsdale Bowl Committee will hold its first of several meetings dedicated to selecting this year’s honorees on December 8, 2024. Nominees for both the Bowl Award and the Spotlight Award are requested on or before December 6th.
The Scarsdale Bowl, under the auspices of the Scarsdale Foundation, has been awarded annually since 1944, to an individual (or, in exceptional cases, to a married couple or domestic partners) who have given “unselfishly of their time, energy and effort to the civic welfare of the community.” The founding donors of the Bowl believed that “many who serve generously and voluntarily, without office, honor, or publicity, are those deserving of having their names permanently inscribed on the Scarsdale Bowl.” The Scarsdale Bowl Award is an enormous honor bestowed on a Scarsdale resident in recognition of his or her volunteer public service in the community over the course of some decades. The Bowl itself, with the honorees engraved names, is permanently displayed at the Scarsdale Public Library.
Candidates must be Scarsdale residents who do not currently hold elective office; to access the Bowl Award nominee recommendation form, please visit this URL:
In addition, the Scarsdale Foundation will continue the tradition it began in 2023 and present a second award, called the Spotlight, to honor an individual or an organization that has made a significant impact and brought about positive change in one targeted sphere of community engagement.
The Spotlight Award recognizes a Scarsdale resident or institution that has focused on moving the needle in one particular area.
Candidates must be Scarsdale residents or institutions, and individuals may not currently hold elective office; to access the Spotlight Award nominee recommendation form, please visit this URL:
This year, the Scarsdale Foundation Bowl Dinner will be held on April 24th at Mamaroneck Beach
and Yacht Club. The dinner will pay tribute to the honorees while celebrating the spirit and culture of volunteerism in Scarsdale. Funds raised at the dinner will enable the Foundation to continue its mission of quietly but effectively helping local individuals and community organizations through student scholarships and project grants. Most significantly, the Scarsdale Foundation has awarded more than $1 million in scholarships during the past ten years to Scarsdale’s high school graduates in their sophomore, junior and senior years of college.
The 2024 Scarsdale Foundation Bowl Committee members are: Penny Bauersfeld, Randi Culang, Elise Flagg, Lori Kaplan, Tracy Lazarus, Angela Manson, Toby Milstein Schulman, Daniela Retelny, Alli Seiden, Ryan Spicer, Stephanie Stern, Claudie Uribe and Julie Zhu. Cynthia and Marc Samwick are serving as Co-Chairs, with Amy Cooper serving as Secretary and Isabel Finegold serving as Treasurer. Isabel Finegold, a Scarsdale Foundation Trustee, will also serve on the committee as a liaison, along with Anne Lyons, President of the Scarsdale Foundation Board.
We look forward to gathering on April 24th to recognize all that makes Scarsdale a special place to live, and to benefit generations to come.
Questions? Please reach out to Cynthia and Marc Samwick, Bowl Chairs at [email protected] or [email protected]. Additional information about the Scarsdale Foundation can be found at www.scarsdalefoundation.org
Last Minute Move By Mamaroneck Tigers Ends the Raiders Run
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- Written by Sharon Higgins
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The Scarsdale High School Varsity Football Team gave it their all in the semifinal playoff game against Mamaroneck at home on Friday night November 8, 2024. The Raiders came out strong and led the Tigers 14-7 at the half. In the third quarter, although Mamaroneck scored a tying touchdown and extra point, the Raiders still looked strong and even had a third interception of the game by senior Logan Mancusi.
The stands were packed with students, parents and community members of all ages. Most fans got the memo to dress in the USA theme of red, white and blue attire. There were flags waving, cheerleaders flying and loud chants to spur the Raiders on.
The blustery wind made for tricky conditions on the field and the temperature dropped throughout the game to a chilly low 50’s. The wind whipped up the leaves and debris from the stands and it looked like a snowstorm coming down.
Tragically, in the last minutes of the fourth quarter, the Tigers moved the ball down the field and in the final 5 seconds of the game, with good field position (within 10 yards of the goal), they scored the winning field goal to end the game Mamaroneck 17, Scarsdale 14.
Despite the sad loss, the Raiders were proud of their tenacity and performance throughout the season. It has been several years since Scarsdale has made the playoffs and all their hard work got them far this season.
A Roaring Good Time in Support of the Library
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- Written by Lauren Rubino
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Photo Credit: Julie BalsamIf you walked into Beach Point Club in Mamaroneck, NY, on the evening of October 17, you may have thought you were back to the Roaring ‘20s. Gold, black, and white decor—from giant feather plume centerpieces to sparkling metallic balloons—dressed up the room, and guests wore their most glamorous 20s attire, adorned with beads, pearls, and boas (oh my!). Inspired by the famous novel, The Great Gatsby, by F. Scott Fitzgerald, this was the setting for the 2024 Friends of the Scarsdale Library Gala, which benefited the Scarsdale Public Library. With a theme of “A Roaring Good Time in Gatsby’s Library,” the event truly lived up to its name.
Beyond the decor and the festive attire, there was lots of fun and merriment for the 200 guests in attendance: food and drinks, including Gatsby-themed cocktails; music and dancing; interactive balloon raffles and a silent auction, both with prizes from national brands and many Scarsdale favorites; casino games; and a photo booth to capture it all.
Not only was the event a roaring good time, it was also a successful fundraiser in support of Scarsdale’s beloved library, raising over $100,000. Partway through the evening, gala co-chairs Daniela Retelny Blum and Toby Milstein Schulman took a moment to explain why supporting the Friends of the Scarsdale Library is so important. 
Photo Credit: Julie Balsam
“Our tax dollars help cover the critical operating expenses of the library but cannot cover all of the amazing programming, technology, and bigger projects that our community loves. That’s where the Friends of the Scarsdale Library come in,” said Retelny Blum. “The Friends work in close partnership with the Library team to bring relevant and inspired content to the Scarsdale community.”
All funds raised from the gala will go toward doing just that—ensuring that the library continues to be a cultural and intellectual hub for the Scarsdale community, sponsoring everything from book discussions with popular authors and adult writing classes to children’s concerts, teen study nights and the maker space.
“We truly want to make the Scarsdale Library a center for everyone in the community,” said Milstein Schulman.
The Friends of the Scarsdale Library would like to thank their headline sponsors:
Speakeasy Sponsor:
The Angela Retelny Team at Compass
Glitz & Glamour Sponsor: 
Photo Credit: Julie Balsam
The Longevity Space
Roaring ‘20s Sponsors:
Cheryl and Philip Milstein
Toby and Judah Schulman
Breaking Solutions
The Laura Miller Team at Houlihan Lawrence
Wilson & Son Jewelers
Shoreline Painting
Whispering Angel
They would also like to thank all of the gala's sponsors and contributors, as well as Sabine Poisson, event producer and designer, who donated the glamorous and festive decor that transported everyone back in time for the evening.
For more information about the Friends of the Scarsdale Library or to make a donation, please visit https://www.scarsdalelibrary.org/connect/friends. If you would like to get involved with the Friends, please email [email protected].
Photo Credit: Julie Balsam
Photo Credit: Julie Balsam
